Focal Passage: Genesis 13:5-11, 14-18
Families often face difficult crossroads of conflict. Problems can arise when we only look after our own interests. Abram and Lot responded to a family squabble by wisely deciding to part ways. However, Lot’s decision, out of greed and self-conceit, would result in life-altering consequences.
Identify the source of conflict. News flash: families fight! It is a reality of life today as it was in Genesis 13. God had so blessed Abram’s family in Canaan that Abram and his nephew Lot’s possessions became too much for them to coexist in the same region. This caused quarreling between the herdsmen of the two patriarchs over available grazing land.
There also was external pressure from others in the area. If left unchecked, this conflict would undoubtedly develop into open hostility and even permanent estrangement between family members. Abram saw this and had the foresight to proactively seek out a solution. When disagreements develop, families of faith must first identify the source of the trouble.
Abram quickly and correctly surmised that there were too many flocks and tents for the land to support. Once the issue was identified, a solution became apparent.
Develop a selfless family attitude. Abram realized that he and Lot had to split up. Instead of scheming to guarantee the choicest pastures for his own sheep and cattle, Abram gave Lot the first choice on where to go.
Abram operated from a mindset of abundance. He said to Lot, “Isn’t the whole land before you?” Abram believed the promise of God that the Lord would give him and his descendants the land of Canaan. There was plenty of land to go around.
God’s promises for His people are guaranteed and infinite in scope. Jesus promises a life that is a “well of water springing up … for eternal life” (John 4:14). Yet, many families (even Christian ones) often maintain a scarcity mindset, thinking family time, money, resources and influence to be limited, so they focus on possession, ownership and control. Often in family conflicts, individual members assert their perceived rights or get offended when those privileges are trampled upon.
Families thrive when they are conditioned by unconditional love, patient grace and do not focus on agendas or cherished birthrights. Abram gave Lot the ability to choose a land for his own family and flocks. Lot immediately considered his own best interest and the rights he believed he had as a family member and owner of such vast possessions.
He picked the greenest land he could see, the environs of Sodom and Gomorrah. However, within Lot’s generation, this verdant land would become a desert wasteland, pummeled by fire and brimstone.
Trust God with the outcome. When Lot departed, God reassured Abram and promised the whole land for his descendants. God instructed Abram to look at the land of Canaan in all directions (even the portion claimed by Lot). This would be his family’s inheritance.
When we genuinely seek the welfare of others and drop our self-conceit, family conflicts can become occasions for growth, understanding, love and forgiveness. When we focus on the promises of God, He will usher us into a truly abundant and fulfilling life. B&R