Focal Passage: Matthew 18:21-35
Love leads us to forgive. Not only that, being loved empowers and compels us to forgive. This discourse presents an incredible example of a man who had been forgiven an impossible debt, only to threaten and abuse another whose debt he would himself not forgive.
When we realize the great, infinitely immeasurable debt we owe, it is impossible for us to then withhold forgiveness from someone to whom we owe it. I regularly encounter people who recount a great pain or offense caused them by another person.
Sometimes, through tears, they recall the depth of pain and admit that they simply can’t forgive their offender. Without undermining that great pain, I always bring the conversation back to our great sin debt which is forgiven in Christ.
When I truly understand the horror of the pain my sin has caused, as well as the right wages of death coming as a consequence, a certain paradigm shift happens in my heart. No matter what pain a brother has caused me, it is always immensely less than the pain my sin caused the Father when He looks down from His throne and sees His only Son writhing in agony on the cross, the cross upon which I nailed Him with my every sin. When I think of that forgiveness, grace and infinite mercy He has shown me, I can’t help but respond by forgiving others their (by comparison) light offenses and small debts against me.
There is another point about our command to forgive others — we do it for our good. Forgiving someone does not change our mind about what they did and it does not make it okay. It does, however, give up any right we hold to punish them for it.
Brown
Such an act may not have any impact on them, but it will have a definite and immense impact on you. Unforgiveness infects the soul like a cancer. It infects as it spreads, stealing joy, crippling our walk with Christ and hampering any growth in Christlikeness. We must forgive, for our own sake! I don’t need someone’s permission or even acknowledgement to forgive them. It doesn’t require anything from them. When I have tasted the freedom of what it means to be forgiven in Christ, I crave the freedom that comes from forgiving others in response.
Finally, even knowing all this, forgiveness can be a hard process. It is like my mind knows I am commanded to forgive, and even want to, but my heart is stubborn.
I’ve found it helps when I settle the issue by deciding to forgive someone with my mind, then treating them like a forgiven person with my actions. This includes praying God’s blessings for them, encouraging and commending them at any given opportunity and serving them if I’m able.
I can’t hate the people for whom I’m praying. When my mind decides to forgive and my will acts like I’ve forgiven someone, my heart quickly gets the message and changes toward them. My pain diminishes, my anger melts, and my bitterness turns to blessings as I choose to intentionally treat them like someone I’ve forgiven.
We are commanded to forgive but we are first shown how to forgive as God in Christ Jesus has intentionally forgiven us. B&R
